Marriage Break Up
Many marriages end without even starting.
There is great love, there is a beautiful wedding that suits your taste, and at that moment nothing in the world can disturb this union, but often great sadness is followed by disappointment and misunderstanding.
Undeniably, the reasons for divorce are very different and complicated, but according to therapists, lawyers and consultants – the tendencies recur. Despite the many scenarios, we can broadly organize them into six categories.
Pressure to remain silent
Keeping a marriage long and happy is hard work. If one or the other partner feels he has put too much worries on his shoulders, he may just “break” at some point.
However, the burden of care becomes twice as heavy if the partner does not feel welcomed and the desire to know his pain. Most often, such situations end with a partner’s question – “But why didn’t you tell me sooner?” or “I would have helped if I knew”.
No one is a magician and can’t sneak into each other’s head, so the most important thing in a relationship is to create a healthy conversational environment that would otherwise result in a rapid divorce process.
Assumption – marriage changes everything
Many people believe that marriage is like a magic pill, which makes all the problems small and insurmountable.
Marriage is one stage of an ascending relationship, but for some couples putting a ring on their finger will make disagreements unprecedented, as well as almost all of a partner’s bad habits or character traits unprecedented.
We could call such an assumption infinitely naïve. If a person was a proper “party animal” before the wedding, the ring put on the finger does not ensure the immediate disappearance of the habit.
Even in his already married status, the partner will still want to go to have fun at the first opportunity, so – if you were not at peace with some nasty habit, it is likely that it will make your existence even more intolerable.
Disagreements with wife’s and husband’s relatives
The wedding day is a starting point for the new family, but it is not just the foundations for the new union that are being laid on this day.
At the moment, we add another part to the existing family regiment – the husband’s or wife’s family, which plays a major role in the union’s development.
If the partner has not fully agreed on what kind of relationship the other half wants with their relatives in the future, or if the parents see with their offspring, it can be very disappointing.
Of course, in most cases the relationship with the partner’s family is very good, but there are just as many situations where the role of the other half’s family seems too big and important.
As long as people are just “making friends” and are in the status of a simple couple, this issue may not be a headache either – if there is a disagreement on a topic so as not to create unnecessary sharpness, people simply choose to remain silent.
However, if such situations regularly recur in the status of spouses, do not escape disputes, forcing the partner to choose between the loved one and his family.
If you don’t want an idea to fall apart or fail at an early stage, it’s important to make a plan with key stops. It is advisable to apply the same principle to marriage.
Problems arise when the planting of the plan is started only after the rings have been removed, because then the very important “components” may not coincide.
Undoubtedly, no one is clairvoyant to say how life will turn out, but an example is the need to come to a common denominator about –
- the number of children in the family;
- finances and budgets;
- and the involvement of the above relatives in everyday life.
The dating phase can be very worrying. It follows this by an exploratory section, which is often set as a logical continuation of the wedding day, which is also welcomed and planned with enthusiasm.
The conclusion is one – such a routine life may not have survived yet, which makes many married friends think about extinguishing the fire, compatibility of the rhythms of the day, showing the true face, etc.
Issues and hurry
Finances may be one of the major reasons for marital problems, both after the first year and after 21 years of living together, but this issue can play an even bigger role at a young age.
While some will share their problems with everyone, adversities and personal issues, others may find it particularly difficult.
It may seem to them they will deal with, for example, debts during their studies, but when the intended one does not go through the road and has to discover the truth, the pit may have been dug too deep.
Loans and debts are not the topic you want to talk about when romance vibrates in the air. Also, not all couples think about the marriage decision properly, so there is not really enough time to discuss this issue.
When people have just fallen in love, they see the world in “different colors”, and this can cause unresolved issues and cast doubt on the partner’s openness to the moment.